[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

@JP10 thanks for all the details! Happy the weather cooperated & y'all had a great time! Congrats again and wishing y'all many years of happiness.

Turkish Pickle is it her actions or reactions to things that is bothering you? Like someone else said, talk to her. See if it's resolvable. Things like that just don't disappear. If she's willing to realize it and work on it, that's a win. If not, beware.

Reactions to things - this happened just last night; I come home from work, we hang out and talk a bit then I go to my computer. Chatting with my friends I learn the 3080Ti is coming out today, so I decide to go to Best Buy to learn more and see if i can buy one (empty hope but was worth a shot). Then I go to Microcenter, end up getting a whole different card - but my 6 month quest to find a graphics card is over.

On the way back she tells me she's been feeling like she's just a +1 to my life and that I never prioritize her. Turns out, this was only the second ever time this happened. I genuinely forgot we were going to cook dinner and just hang at home to watch a movie last night, I don't think that's never prioritizing someone. I also don't feel its fair to exaggerate it to always, nor fair to not say anything before. I asked her if she wanted to come with because I was going to BB, she says yes of course and jolts off the couch to get ready... It's like, why didn't you say "no i thought we were going to watch movie tonight"?

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by King Rudi

A couple of theories that I have, just something to ponder.

Most in-laws (or those who fit this role) are viewed as terrible because of how the significant other cares for their mate and disagrees with how their mate was treated by their parents. I'm still getting used to the fact that this is how my boys girlfriends see me. I know both of my wives felt this way about my both of my parents.

Most people mature to end up being much like their parents.

Just food for thought my friend.

Honestly if anything, I don't have a single problem with how she treats me on a regular basis. It's pretty cute actually and I'm really happy about it often. But especially lately there's been lots of "woman moments" and those have been getting to me a lot because theyve been happening so much more.

If she ends up like her parents I need to sprint out I overheard a call from her mom and I felt bad for gf, no single person deserves to be talked to that way. Terrible person. Dad is no saint either - she stopped talking with him completely after he finally introduced his latina 23 year old gf to her. She facetime'd me when visiting him, and he is a cool dude (but a terrible father) and he goes "Pickle, i figured my girlfriend is the same age as you!!"

[upstatedoc]

run

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

run

Not just yet. She's young and it seems her communication skills are lacking. Sit down and chat with her. Tell her the next time if dinner and watching a movie was important to her then speak up. You are not a mind reader and expected to know that's what she wants especially when she jumps off the couch to get ready. Communication sucks but it's essential.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

Not just yet. She's young and it seems her communication skills are lacking. Sit down and chat with her. Tell her the next time if dinner and watching a movie was important to her then speak up. You are not a mind reader and expected to know that's what she wants especially when she jumps off the couch to get ready. Communication sucks but it's essential.

2nd this.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

Not just yet. She's young and it seems her communication skills are lacking. Sit down and chat with her. Tell her the next time if dinner and watching a movie was important to her then speak up. You are not a mind reader and expected to know that's what she wants especially when she jumps off the couch to get ready. Communication sucks but it's essential.

Valid point - strongly plausible I'm not great at expressing myself either but I've called her out on telling me I need to get better at communicating clearly. Do you have any good pointers/ideas on how I can make that happen, at least for myself?

And - I said exactly what you wrote! Yet still, ended up me forgetting her needs and wants. I asked how long she's felt this way (bc the way she said it came off like i've been doing this since day 1), she said not too long ago just lately. So I asked for a second example.... nope, nothing. The admission of "yeah I don't remember either but that's not what matters" was internally funny.

That's more of what I'm concerned about - I told her this too over the weekend, obviously we perceive things differently but whenever we talk after my actions I doubt myself a lot. Something about that really doesn't sit well with me

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

You are not a mind reader and expected to know that's what she wants . . .

LIAR!!! You are just trying to further obfuscate the female-male interaction dynamic and keep the female control, and apply it to poor Pickle.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Sara

Does Bro-Code not exist anymore?

This is 2021. Morality has left the chat. What you would normally expect, think the opposite outcome; that's your new expectation. Hope this helps. I'm struggling with it as well.

For conversation sake, elaborate.

[nyalpine90]

Originally Posted by Sara

Does Bro-Code not exist anymore?

let me guess they guy your talking to, his buddy tried kicking game to u as well

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Sara

This love square is turning into a love web. I can't decide!

I think I saw this on a episode of dateline recently

[King Rudi]

I've posted this before. I'll post it again as it seems to fit.

"If you try to catch two rabbits, you catch neither one."

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by Sara

This love square is turning into a love web. I can't decide!

I don't like spiders

[Sara]

Well this thread surely has been uneventful...

[Tambohamilton]

I've heard that lady-folk like D.



... I'll see myself out. Enjoy your book!

[Dang3r]

Originally Posted by Sara

Y’all boring tonight

I’m going to read my book.

Read the 2nd one too, maybe then theres more action to explore
What the books are about, story, genre?

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by Sara

What about sea spiders?

I'm OK with them b/c until you F'ers pointed it out, I never thought of them as sea spiders!! Thanks

Originally Posted by Sara

Short version:

Met A. On second date A took me to Tchoup Yard where his buddies/"co-workers" B and C and the rest of the squad were. Wonderful guys.

A is out and about "working." I like to check my likes when I'm bored, just to see who it is that "likes" me. I noticed B had sent a like. I "matched" with B just as a joke. B clearly isn't joking. Then a few days later I see C sends a like (and he's hot AF). Either B and C know something I don't about A, or B and C don't give a fuck about A and are "shooting their shot."

They're all great. Ugh. So I've settled this (for the moment) by staying home and reading two books. I think I need a petting zoo and not commitment. I like reading.

-or- Mr A is testing you with B & C's assistance!

[King Rudi]

I feel like A, B, C and whoever else should have their own dating thread. This may be where I abandon my own thread.

[M5Rick]

Originally Posted by Sara

Well this thread surely has been uneventful...

What about the Fedex pilot, you'll have time to still do your hobbies while he's working and when he's back help with the horse stable upkeep which is a priority.

[M5Rick]

Originally Posted by Sara

He is A. His civilian job is FedEx. We had 4 or 5 dates now. This past month has been a blur for me. A is currently on “guardhard” mode defending the skies right now and B was trying to take me out yesterday. A gives off such playboy vibes. B seems down to earth.


So I’m just going to finish my book.

Is B the one in Mississippi, lives in a quiet out of the way place and likes horses?

[nyalpine90]

Originally Posted by Sara

Short version:

Met A. On second date A took me to Tchoup Yard where his buddies/"co-workers" B and C and the rest of the squad were. Wonderful guys.

A is out and about "working." I like to check my likes when I'm bored, just to see who it is that "likes" me. I noticed B had sent a like. I "matched" with B just as a joke. B clearly isn't joking. Then a few days later I see C sends a like (and he's hot AF). Either B and C know something I don't about A, or B and C don't give a fuck about A and are "shooting their shot."

They're all great. Ugh. So I've settled this (for the moment) by staying home and reading two books. I think I need a petting zoo and not commitment. I like reading.

just becareful in getting in sticky situation unless they become your victims in web
but on a real note -its almost like a betting game, who will get into your pants first!!

[fiveohwblow]

Originally Posted by Sara

What about sea spiders?

[Sara]

Originally Posted by TommyG-inFlaNow

I'm OK with them b/c until you F'ers pointed it out, I never thought of them as sea spiders!! Thanks



-or- Mr A is testing you with B & C's assistance!

Right? I can never look at them as crabs again now. They are sea spiders lol.