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I believe that what the OP is asking was (and may still be) a condition of the lease wherein you cannot do an outright sale of the car to a non-BMW dealer. You can still do a trade-in, but if selling the car to an individual, BMW Financial prevents that, somehow, for some reason.
If you want to get out of the car and possibly get some equity out of it without going through a dealer, you could try Swapalease.
Although, honestly, if there is equity in the car, selling it to a BMW dealer would be the easiest way. Even if you get only wholesale for it, privately selling a two year-old car these days is a huge hassle, and you'd be lucky to get anything near retail for it.
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Current inventory:
F22 & G05
Cadillac CT5-V Blackwing w/3 pedals
Past: E24,E28(3),E34,E36,E37,E38(2),E39(4),E46,E89,E92 (obviously),F01,F06,F10,F30,F87,G12,G30(2),G82(2)
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